Portals Oracle Origin Story

How did the Portals Oracle come to be?

In trying to recount the inception of Portals Oracle when prompted with this curiosity from others, I found myself getting pulled further and further into the past, where I discovered somewhat of a beginning—which was more than a decade prior to the project being even a dreamseed in my heart and vision. 

I’m 21 years old. I’m in Delphi, the site of the ancient Oracle site on Mt. Parnassus in Greece. 

History tells it that the woman who served as the Oracle for the people at Delphi was first a succession of pure, clear-channeled adolescent virgins, and then later switched to women post-menopause because men from all over the place and young virgins were not a safe mixture. These women would leave all of their worldly attachments behind (families, homes, all the things), and devote their whole lives to serving this key societal function. A vessel of service to the whole. She was called the Pythia- the bridge between heaven and earth. When confronted by civilians and travelers with their most critical questions, the Pythia would enter a trance state through the inhalation of some kind of natural vapors steaming up from the ground, and offer enigmatic prophecies which were then interpreted by the priests. The Pythia was consulted by people from all over the ancient and classical world for insight and decision-making guidance. From emperors to farmers, all were permitted to visit the Oracle if they were able to make the trek. This went on for more than a millennium! 

So I’m at that place, studying abroad the summer before my senior year of college. 

My inner mystic was ever so gently budding around this time. I had found yoga a couple of years prior, was a Religious Studies major, enamored by the spiritual traditions of the Eastern world, with no practical ideas about what I wanted to do or be when I grew up. I just knew that I was drawn to holiness more than the “practical worldly stuff”, and so went about learning about God and esoteric mysticism through my formal education. Another way of saying that my experience of the Divine, up until that point, was mainly a mental one. 

As soon as I stepped foot on that sacred oracle ground though, I had this brand new feeling of becoming more alive. It was the first time that I remember encountering divinity not just as a concept in my mind, but as an awakened sense in my body triggered by geography. There was something about those old gorgeous ruins of that oracle site that had a big something to do with something about me, or someone I once was in lifetimes previous. Whatever the case may be, I felt something continuous there. Something unmistakably true. I had no context for it at the time, just an experience of resonance, gentle yet so profound.

A couple of months after I got back from Greece, my mom died very suddenly. She had stage 4 Ovarian Cancer and didn’t know it, and her tumor ruptured and poisoned her system within a couple of days. It was one of those flip your whole life upside down situations that took years and years of grief to process my way through. But it catapulted me into the healing and spiritual realms so earnestly, as the pain of that loss was so all-encompassing and shocking, and my only true solace for working through it was by making contact with the unseen realms however I possibly could.

And thus began my journey with oracles and divination. 

I was enchanted by the ways that we could invite the spiritual dimension into the realm of form to work with us directly. Through tools that we could interpret with our cognitive sensibilities, combined with a deeply surrendered trust—I delighted in the surprise of seeing what was ready to be seen by myself and those who sat before me. 

The more I worked with divination tools, the more undeniable it proved to be a cornerstone of my path. I was (and still am) endlessly amused by the whole thing. After about a decade of exploring and growing with oracle tools personally and with my close community, I began to offer my oracle services professionally. I’ve had the great pleasure of supporting hundreds of people through big life questions and transitions by way of the oracle’s poignant guidance, interpreted through my intuitive understanding.  

I’ve worked mainly with Tarot and many, many other oracle decks, the I-Ching (the Chinese Book of Changes), and Runes.

The Runes, one of my favorite ways to divine, originated in the first century CE by the Norse people. Twenty-four simple, elegant symbols inscribed into small stones, and stored in a pouch. In working with them over the years, I became a big fan of their tactile nature, as well as the sparse symbolism that corresponded to such resonating messages. 

In the summer of 2019, moving through a heartbreak that was undoing me, I craved a spiritual and creative project to channel my energy and help me make sense of my unraveling. I felt inspired to create a modern version of the Runes, add some style and flair to the language, and find artisans to help me reinvent the product with a fresh new spin, while still remaining true to the form. 

I started by transcribing my Runes interpretation book into a Google Doc. My plan was to write out each interpretation, word-for-word, and then go back through and freshen them up. Add a lil’ twist of lemon, so to speak. I spent about a month transcribing the book. Tedious yet satisfying, I was able to integrate the Rune’s symbology even more deeply.

But when it was time for the next step, to add the lemon, my inspiration flat-lined. I stared at the words. I had nothing new to say. It was already written beautifully, and I didn’t actually care to change it.

Womp womp… I was discouraged, to say the least. This project was the outlet I needed in order to cope with the ache that seemed to be taking up very long-term residency in my heart. Without it, I was just a puddle of pain and longing and I needed a way to transmute my experience into something higher.

Then one day, while micro-dosing psilocybin, I received the clarity I was waiting for. It wasn’t my task to re-write the Runes. I was being called to create a new oracle device, inspired and influenced by the Runes format. Once I understood, I sat down and 26 words dropped out of me and onto the page within minutes. I was going through a spiritual initiation through this heart-break-open, and the words that flowed through me were a synopsis of the deep education I was right in the thick of. 

I hit up one of my nearest and dearests, Lano in Tucson. She also happens to be my very favorite artist, and a major inspiration to my heart, truth and creativity, (follow her on instagram to see her beautiful work, soul and cutest new baby – @lannnno). I’ve been watching her bust out all of these magical symbols and color shapes for years, and knew she was the gal for the job. She was all in for it, and so for the next several months I channeled the text for the oracle, while she channeled the art. And we were both so stoked as best pals to have our first creative collab. 

The writing was a breeze. This is how I came to understand that I was simply a conduit assigned to this creation. I spent a year coordinating and managing the other project elements which were less breezy– deciding which medium, shape and size to use for the Portals pieces and how to go about getting the symbols encoded on them and who could do it. Choosing materials for the pouches and finding the ones who would sew them. Discovering the right designers and printer for the book, and so on and so forth. 

And thus, after much trial and error, and many obstacles and delays that go along with any creative endeavor, the Portals Oracle was born. 

Channeling the text for Portals Oracle was a very satisfying experience. To be in a creative flow state for the sake of service is something I hope to re-encounter again and again on my journey. But my FAVORITE part of the Portals Oracle experience is receiving the cherishing words from those who are using it, hearing about how much the tool serves and supports them on a daily basis and in moments of need.

It’s my highest honor to share this creation with you. 

Thank you with all my heart for being here to receive it. 

Mega-super infinite gratitude to my gifted co-creators of this  Portals Oracle magic:

Lano Romero Dash on Symbol Creation & Illustration

MaryHannah Reynolds and Gabrielle Goldman on Book Design

Melanie Ogata on Pouches

Megan Herold on Laser Cut Pieces

Gabrielle Goldman on Landing Page

Jef Taylor on Photography


Dear Tender Masculine,

Maybe at some point you discovered that you couldn’t experience the depths of love you craved by closing up, shutting down, holding in, pulling away… and so you chose the courageous route of learning how to keep yourself open.

The risk of hurt that accompanies one’s willingness to be open is warriorship of the heart.  

Your felt and expressed feelings ripple through all time and space.

In case you haven’t been told lately,

Thank you thank you thank you. 


Love School.

P R E S E N C E

Trust is an inside job. 

K N O W – Y O U R – W O R T H

Status update: Fully worthy of love.

A D A P T

Co-create your destiny by installing new beliefs anchored in truth & love.

P A T I E N C E 

Expand the view to see the bigger picture. Keep expanding until love is the only vision. 

C H O O S E

Choose yourself with every choice and you will always be chosen.

RECEIVE

Don’t ask for more than what is given. 

GIVE

…the sweetest and purest parts of you.

FORGIVE

Forgiveness = Fulfillment.


The Inner World.

Obstacles of the heart are never here on accident.

There isn’t a pain that doesn’t carry within it, the most immaculate lesson for growing bigger into love.

When we swim out of the stories that reinforce our victimhood, and remember that our power lies within our own decision, the stress lets up and the education process begins.

Starting with loving the one who hurts.

I find that equating breath with love is the simplest way to sooth the child inside who’s safety depends on others.

The child inside is learning to sink into the lap of the Divine Mother with total remembrance.

She needs a lot of delightful words of reassurance.

She doesn’t need to be scolded or punished for feeling hard feels. 

She sometimes needs to move in slow motion so that she can be aware of her Godliness. 

She needs to feel herself moving through time and space in awe of the miracle of inhabiting a body.

She needs to watch the cat outside her window, strutting across the street unharmed.


a letter to my inner child.

little honey h,

I see you!

All of your sweet tenderness and innocence and light, and also the fears you hold about being dropped and forgotten. 

Like when you were the last kid to be picked up in preschool, cuz your mom had to work late and it was dark out, and you were always afraid that she wasn’t going to come, especially after your dad died. That must have been very scary and hard when you were so small and fragile.  

I’m letting you know now though, and as many times as you need to hear it, that you will never be dropped or forgotten by me, the big Me, the higher self me who has unconditionally GOT YOU. 

Especially when you feel scared… that is when you can count on me the most to show up and make sure that you are being soothed and comforted through those old fears. Those fears are just showing up to be greeted and tended to with our love. That’s how they are healing, you see?  

I adore how generous you are with giving your heart’s trust to people you feel drawn to, and am also watching the words and actions of those you find yourself involved with, and will do what needs to be done to keep you safe if you find yourself in a situation where you are not feeling valued and cared for.

Remember, I GOT YOU, and will advocate for you, and if needed, remove you from dynamics that aren’t a reflection of your light and worth. I will do this with care for the other (I know that matters to you) through honest communication whenever possible, and will give you the space you need to process the loss or change if it comes to that, and then will build you back up to trust again.

XO,

Higher Self H


The Truth That Lives in Your Heart.

Listen to the truth that lives in your heart.

Even if it’s a private secret that you can’t talk about with most others.

Even if you can’t see evidence of it yet.

Even if everything that you’ve learned runs counter to the feeling and knowing that your heart carries sacred within it.

Even if you have no idea how it’s going to come to fruition, or what you will do when it does.

The truth that lives in your heart is more valuable than any advice you can receive from another.

When we try and deny the truth that lives in our heart, we go to war with ourselves. 

When we deny our heart’s truth to protect ourselves from the pain of it not becoming, we cut ourselves off from the Source that is taking care of everything.

The truth that lives in your heart is a compass leading you to where you will know the most peace, love, joy and freedom.

Working through layers of denial, logic and conditioning will help you see and trust the truth that lives in your heart more readily.

Work through those layers, and don’t let anyone tell you that the truth that lives in your heart is not worth every ounce of your effort. 

Give the truth that lives in your heart everything that you’ve got. 


Sacral Chakra Activation.

Notice where your mind harps on deprivation.

Realize that as long as deprivation is circulating, the circumstances will remain as such.

First, change your mind. Change your thinking habits. Change your default feeling states. 

Practice

Practice

Practice

Every moment is a new opportunity to practice. 

Then simply allow for something new to emerge.

Your job is not to go finding the things you want, while feeling sad about not having them.

Your job is to mine your mind for scarcity and take deliberate internal action to reach for new, helpful and inspiring thoughts that offer you relief.

Focus on thoughts that make you feel good.

Getting caught up in a constant repetition of the displeasing storylines of what “is”

will certainly ensure more of what isn’t pleasing you.

Feel into what you want as if it’s already DONE. 

Because it is done. It’s simply waiting for you to become a vibrational match so that it can materliaze. 

Sacral Chakra ACTIVATION:

My creativity flows effortlessly. 

The flame of my passion is fully LIT. 

I feel pleasure streaming through my body and heart. 

I am fully connected to myself, and can be fully present with another.

My sacred oasis is mine, and I only let those in who feel safe, present, honoring and delicious.


Q-Lyfe.

Processing the shock of unprecedented mystery. 

GLOBAL PANDEMIC

FLATTEN THE CURVE

PEOPLE ARE DYING

VULNERABLE POPULATIONS

PROTECT YOURSELF AND OTHERS

WORK FROM HOME

STAY INSIDE

IT’S GONNA BE A WHILE

WE DON’T KNOW HOW LONG

Okay, okay

I hear you.

And

I’ll choose my own mantras, thank you very much.

BE HERE NOW

GOD IS CHANGE

HONOR THE UNRAVELING

SURRENDER TO THE UNDOING

THANK YOU FOR THE OPPORTUNITY

THIS IS THE GREAT AWAKENING

SLOW DOWN TO FEEL MORE

LET LOVE WIN

TRUST IT ALL


Let It Be.

You know those songs you listened to when you had a shattered heart. And even after a chunk of time has passed, and you’ve done a great deal of mending, you put the songs on and are transported right back to the agony of having to let go of that one you would’ve rather just loved forever. You remember the car rides– blasting the songs as the tears streamed down like waterfalls, trying to pull it together before arriving at your destination, embarrassed about your swollen, red eyes, feeling kinda unsafe crying so hard on the freeway, but there was no stopping the flow, wishing for any possibility to emerge to justify holding on. While also knowing that letting go was the only way forward. And you listen to those songs now, remembering how enduringly devastated you felt, how thick the resistance was to letting go, taken right back to the memories of how it was to love that one so deeply and to have to say goodbye…

There was nothing left to do but let it be.


My Story

I didn’t know for a good long while, and sometimes I still forget, that my outer world is a holographic map of my internal being. My relationships and interactions, my environment, and all the situations I happen to find myself in are showing me my deepest beliefs about myself. When I started to clue into the connection between the inner and the outer, I felt uncomfortably responsible, and in some cases, ashamed. But the more I marinated in the experience of interconnectedness, the more I started to feel empowered, and able to use this knowing to aid in my self-service. 

If my external world is constantly giving me the most useful and relevant information and circumstances for my spiritual evolution, then the pathway toward wholeness is no longer shrouded in convolution and confusion. 

Because as it turns out, everything that I need in order to evolve is right smack in front of me, and right on time. 

Can I get a Hallelujah?  

Especially as it relates to the recurring themes and patterns that show up again and again. Instead of judging myself for “still being stuck in this or that godforsaken lesson” I learned that it was much more useful to love myself through it, aaalllllllll the way through it, no matter how long it takes. 

When my approach to my healing changed from judgement to love, everything else began to shift along with it. I’m not perfect at this still, it’s something I have to reinforce on the daily, but it is becoming more and more natural for me to soften to my various parts and access my innocence. 

When I started to get that love was the answer to all of life’s big and small questions, I discovered that I can take refuge in the safety of my own heart. That simply making contact with my heart with my hands and breath helps me to move from my monkey mind to my tender feelings, where I am able to both comfort myself and get to the truth of love. 

When I began to embrace and accept my dark, wounded, and insecure places, I found myself actually capable of genuinely loving others. I became more brave in allowing myself to be authentically seen, and more allowing of others to be who they are, and where they are on their journeys. 

When I learned how to let go, like really let shit go as a way of life, I developed a whole lot more space for pleasure, delight, gratitude, and trust.

When I gave myself permission to receive, ask for help, and accept the support that was being offered to me, I could finally appreciate an honest experience of fulfillment.

When I experienced the fact that helping others live more conscious and fulfilling lives was just as rewarding as helping myself live mine, my path cleared up and continues to unfold in remarkably beautiful ways. 

I used to wear my pain like a badge of honor. My early life was punctuated with a lot of loss and illness in my immediate family, which left me feeling terrified of life and intimate connections. I lead with my hurt, felt victimized by “being left”, and wayward in the complexities of being alive. My identity was intermingled with my pain.

Until I discovered that I had the power to shift my commitments. And so I started swapping my commitment to my victimhood for a commitment to my alignment. Which became a commitment to listening and responding to the stirrings of my heart, and a commitment to surrendering to the unconditional love and support of the Divine.

And then eventually, I started to interface with my sadness differently. I didn’t have to run from it anymore, or try and solve it. I started trusting the flow of my emotions, didn’t judge my lows so harshly, which gave me access to a sensation of thriving pulsing through my body and spirit.

And I wanted more of that. And so, little by little, I adopted healing and enlightenment as a lifestyle, as an every-day mission and intention, trusting that every interaction, obstacle, and trigger is a healing opportunity to know and love myself better.  

My healing style is intuitive. It’s creative, whimsical, humor-full, and honest. It’s about connecting heart-to-heart, third-eye-to-third-eye, soul-to-soul to remember how deserving we all are of:

*Safe and enriching relationships and spaces

*Thriving health and vital life force

*Work that reflects our unique gifts and sweetest joy

*Healthy, satisfying intimacy

*The confidence to show up and say yes

*The courage to own our no and establish healthy boundaries

*The skillset to navigate our pain with compassion and awareness

*The ability to communicate from our hearts

*The humility to let God lead

My training – formal and informal – spans an eclectic spectrum of creative and healing art forms. 

I have studied with coaches, art therapists, Buddhists, and masterful healers in bodywork, energy healing and the psychic arts. I have a background in expressive arts education and creative youth development. I am an avid student and teacher of spirituality, and am forever seeking new perspectives to see and appreciate the uniqueness of others, so as to help others see and appreciate themselves. 

Being of service to those on the path to wholeness is one of my favorite things about my life. I look forward to the opportunity to hold space for your journey toward greater alignment, activation, and love.

<3,

Halley